Lama's Full Moon letter Dec 2022

Retreats and Gendun and Norbu's wedding

It's been a full-on month after returning from Tyn Y Gors and going to Ty Pren for nearly a week retreat on my own for the first time, it felt very, very, very special. Sister Verina says in her book, The Simplified Life, how important place is and it certainly came to me in a new way. What place might ultimately mean and how one is always in that one place. It felt like a very auspicious place to be meditating. It was a very stormy week, looking out to sea was quite dramatic with the foam crashing over the rocks, just below where the cottage is.

As soon as I got back, it was time to start the Guru Rinpoche retreat with those people who are practising the short Vajrasattva practice and the Rain of Wisdom practice of Guru Rinpoche and Yeshe Tsyogal. It is very short and compact and implies that one has covered a lot of ground even though it's introduced quite early; one can get a sense of it even without really understanding the illusions within it.

As soon as we got started we got news that Khenpo Rinpoche Tsultrim Gyatso's health had taken a downturn. He'd caught a cold and was hospitalised for a while and then came home with a doctor in regular attendance and a nurse. Ponlop Rinpoche was very concerned and Karl and Stephanie were called out there to help Ponlop Rinpoche in any way he needed. Elizabeth Callahan and I were discussing whether we should both also get out there. So this took up quite a lot of attention for a few days. I thought about going and realised that I just didn't actually have the energy to go. But I didn't want to not be there if this was the end, if you like. I wanted to show my respect and solidarity even though as Elizabeth said, Rinpoche is with us all the time, there is no direction, time or distance in terms of the presence of the Guru. So I decided I wouldn't go until I knew for certain that it would be the last time I'd be going. In the meantime, I'm trying to find out more about what's wrong with my health so that I can go when it's needed, but at the moment I don't think I'm well enough.

We discovered after some weeks that Rinpoche's health has stabilised and they're not as concerned that anything's going to happen immediately, so we keep our prayers going. The 17th Karmapa, Tinley Dorje asked all of Rinpoche's students to pray for his long life; he sent us a special prayer that he'd written and told us to do the White Tara mantra, which we started to do each evening, and will do for at least for a while. It's interesting how Tara has come up again and again recently. I've been talking to Agnes about her introducing Tara practice to her group because they're requesting it, and encouraging Tara to also work with Agnes about how we can introduce more Tara practice into our sangha. Especially the Tara dance that Khenpo Rinpoche encouraged us to do and gave us songs for. I'm not sure how we will fit it into our programme but I wouldn't want people to feel that, within the Awakened Heart Sangha, there was no Tara practice as part of our lineage transmission, as it were.

There was quite a lot of ripening karma going on during the retreat, what with Rinpoche's health, and then Sudhana came down sick and ended up in hospital with kidney shock. And that was all quite dramatic, but he's back now in his retreat in his yurt, and well and happy. And during the second week of the retreat Jonathan had to leave because his mother was in hospital and got Covid, she wanted to go home so he was needed. So with one thing and another there was a lot to deal with during the two weeks. Nonetheless, it was very wonderful to be practising intensively together. 

After the two-week retreat, I was able again to return to Ty Pren for five days, which again was quite wonderful for me. This time it was so still, the water was so calm, and I could sit outside on the cliff top and meditate for quite a long time without getting cold so it's been beautiful actually, the sun shining on the water and clouds forming beautiful formations, sitting at dusk just watching the sun going down. In the morning it rises on one side and sets on the other side in the evening. It's quite special and atmospheric and conducive to quiet meditation.

I had to go back to the Hermitage for various appointments for my eye checkup and dental hygienist and blood tests and so on to see if something can be done about my energy. While I was there, on the fourth of December, Rigdzin Shikpo gave us his annual talk. He ended up talking for a couple of hours, even though he'd kept us waiting a couple of hours, but it was worth it. He talked about the journey into the mysterious world of reality, which was a perfect introduction to our next year's theme of the Vaster Vision. You need the vaster vision in order to understand karma, samsara and the origin of suffering, and why it's possible for us to vow to save all beings. It's all in the nature of the universe, he was talking about that in a very moving and inspiring way. And I was able to ask him some questions about Mandala principle that I've been wanting to ask him for some time.

Some good news is that Norbu and Gendun are now married! They were able to come to the Hermitage, just before leaving to go to the registry office, and I was able to give them a blessing and a Vajrasattva image which felt like a very auspicious start for their life together. I will return to Ty Pren until the solstice and the festive season, when there will just be Tara, Norbu, K-Tso and myself, I think. Jayasiddhi and Eli are going to visit family.

I hope you're all ready for the next year's programme. Focusing on the vaster vision that provides the basis for making the most powerful pranhidanas for the benefit of all beings. So, wishing you all the best for this festive season, and the New Year, I hope you get plenty of opportunity to apply the teachings and practice in your life. And hopefully, do plenty of meditation sessions and maybe retreat days or weeks or whatever possibilities you have. I feel very blessed and happy to have such enthusiastic and harmonious students who are all working together to support each other. So thank you, and till next time.

Love Shenpen